Owner Bio
Simon "Simms" Cable: inventor, commissioner, raconteur: personifies the "can-do spirit" like no one else. It is as if God Himself decided on a whim to fashion a human being out of just grit and determination (and some hair), placing him on Earth to serve as an inspiration to billionaires everywhere.
It was as a light-hitting utility man in the Toronto Blue Jays system that Simms first stumbled upon the idea to sell chewing tobacco to children. After all, what kid didn't want to be like a big leaguer, scratching his nuts, chewing tobacco, and violating groupies by the busload? Unfortunately, local ordinances being what they were forced Simms to abandon the idea of putting REAL tobacco in brightly-colored pouches embossed with cartoon characters. So one day, while enjoying a candy novelty cigarette or two, it hit him: why not put an obscene amount of sugary, shredded bubble gum in the pouch instead? Big League Chew was born on the spot and Simms made his fortune.
Fast forward 10 years later. After several failed creations: including whole wheat chocolate and naked lady lightbulbs, Mr. Cable (that's what his waitstaff calls him) decided to buy into the fledgling Front Office Baseball League. A few innocent fistfights and rehab trips later, the league decided to replace the founding commish, STK, with Mr. Inspiration: Simon Cable.
It is at The Hangar--Wichita's home park--that Simms applies his wit and genius: cranking out Burgers on a Stick and Beer by the Gallon Jug to Tumbleweed faithful. Whether it's entertaining local Wichita celebs or holding impromptu motivational clinics for overweight shut-ins, Simon Cable continues to make his mark on the American Landscape.
Franchise Lineage:
2001 to Present: Wichita Tumbleweeds — Owner: Simon Cable (aka "Simms")
